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Mike Nencetti
its nice to have a place to call home, even if it is an apartment.
basically my wife's two children wanted access to our joint checking savings accounts, so they can withdraw her money. The estate lawyer said no, repeatedly. They also want to re define the beneficiary % for her accounts life, 401k, pension. Once again the estate lawyer said no. That was enough to get me to move ASAP and do my best to avoid saying anything, or doing anything stupid. - Mike Nencetti
My goal is to be fair. we still have a chance to do that. There was a will, before we were married. The kids get the house. I'm fine with that. They grew up in the house. By law the pension goes to the spouse, which is larger than the home equity which is basically the estate. you can see how complicated things will be as we sort this out next year. I needed a place to call my own. a place to get away from the home estate mess. - Mike Nencetti
when my wife died, basically I was a squatter. i had no right to live in the house. According to the will, I did not need to make any more mortgage payments. so I left. - Mike Nencetti
((hugs)) so glad you have been able to find a good place to live while the legal stuff is being sorted out. I hope they will see sense soon. - WoH: Professor MOTHRA
There may be 100k in equity in the house. The Charlotte market is very good. Hope the house can sell soon. we have no debt, except for a small mortgage. the probate should start today. - Mike Nencetti
So glad you have a sanctuary of some kind for the time being. You are an inspiration the way you're handling all of this with such grace. Remember to get what you need also, whatever that is. - t-ra is ugly crying
this sanctuary rocks. y'all rock. I miss my wife. i just have her ashes, well, 1/3 of them. I will probably take them to the beach, like the outer banks this summer. - Mike Nencetti
I'm glad you have a place to call yours. I'll echo t-ra's comment about how you've handled Beverly's illness and passing with such grace and dignity. I hope the legal issues are resolved quickly and fairly for all. *hugs* - vicster.
My advice to is brush up on estate law. a 401k beneficiary will override a will. - unless the will explicitly mentions the 401k, or life insurance, or checking account, ot there is a trust.... Will's are for stuff, like a house or car or boat. - Mike Nencetti
Janet, I have wanted to speak out. - in late September my wife is dying and the Dr's have recommended hospice. They give her 3 months. (she had 1.5) as her husband and the primary caregiver make the decision for hospice. (legally that is how it works, medical power of attorney is overruled by the primary caregiver) - I get attacked for this decision, and for every decision regarding her treatment. Being a stepdad is tough. I get little respect. - Mike Nencetti
Again, what you've done and how you've done it, with the utmost care and integrity, is beyond reproach to any observer. Her kids may be dealing with their stress by nitpicking you as an easy target. Anyhow, that's just conjecture. Point of the ramble is, I can't imagine doing what you've done the splendid way you have, and if you need to make your feelings known, then dammit do so. When my stepdad died, my brothers almost came to blows over some power play bs. It was horrible. There's no easy way through loss. *hand squeeze* - t-ra is ugly crying
Mike, I'm so sorry for the estate mess, but very glad that you have a home of your own and an estate attorney that is speaking up. Having been through an ugly estate settlement when my grandmother died, I'm sending good thoughts to you with hopes that probate goes as smoothly as possible. - Galadriel C.